


Holding on

by Lokisgame



Series: To have and to hold [7]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: Drabble, F/M, Movie: Fight The Future, X-Files OctoberFicFest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-08
Updated: 2016-10-08
Packaged: 2018-08-20 07:41:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8241623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lokisgame/pseuds/Lokisgame
Summary: He owes her that much, he owes her everything really.





	

It was a gradual progression from uncertainty to full confidence as their reserve melted away, unearthing first concern, then care and finally love growing from friendship and shared expiriences.  
His initial mistrust came from the situation that brought them together. He worked alone and he liked it that way, his newly rediscovered independence allowing him to pursue anything and everything he found interessting. She came with the task of reining him in; her job in his not-so-humble opinion being mainly to spy on him. He couldn't help but resent the idea, but interestingly enough not the woman herself.  
He came to the office that morning feeling equall mix of mistrust, doubt, and curiosity, with a splash of excitement on the side.

Dana Kathrine Scully, a scientist and a medical doctor. Some men feared the likes of her, women who know what they want and go out and get it. He usually had good report with women and didn't feel threatened by her in any way personally. Girls liked him and he liked them. Most guys didn't like him but he thought it childish, so he stood on his own, did all by himself and moved on without giving it much thought on a daily basis. Pissing contest never did much for him anyway.  
His naturall openness to the world made him look at things from different angles, and after first few hours spent with her, curiosity won and changed his course. His new angle in this assignment was to make the most of her abilities, he decided that FBI was giving him resources.  


In hindsight he realized how her skepticism made him work harder, gave him an everchanging challenge, constant stimulation to his ever racing mind. The Scully test. He came to her with a case, presented the facts as he knew them and started to bounce ideas of her. His unconventionall theories versus her rational explanations, his gut feeling tested by her science. She steadied his course by giving reason to his madness. She was open but reasonable, critical of his notions, but not critical of him. She did usually think him crazy but accepted it. Trust followed, turning into friendship, responsibility and care for each other.  


Then They took her away and it was his childhood all over again. Only difference was he wasn't a child anymore, this time he knew what was happening, that knowledge didn't lend him any strength though. He thumbed her gold cross around his neck and thought about her God. Where is your God Scully, why did he let this happen to you? How do you make him hear your silent preyers?  
In his dark hours he wanted to quit, he almost gave up, he knew somehow that alone didn't feel right anymore. But she woke up and his quest wasn't just his anymore. They came back twice as determined to find answers; for his sister and for Scully.  


Life went on, with monsters, aliens, burning train carts, mind controling sociopaths, black oil and green blood, for so long that the unusuall became the usual.  
Scully stayed true to her nature and as with science and medicine before, she took the part and owned it, determined to excell at her every endeavor. He watched as her professionalism became her shield and weapon against a world set out to ridicule and dismiss the work that became their life. She amazed him with her knowledge and willingness to explore his universe of possibilities. Her imagination elevated her science and with his talent for reading people they were unstoppable. Confidence grew from years of shared experience in facing the unnatural, the unfathomable and the unexplained.  


His easy going nature softend her seamingly hard exterior as their lives became more and more entwined. Quietly assuming possesion of the other, profesional partnership extending to personal friendship. The thought of loneliness got burried under everyday proximity as he somehow claimed her undivided attention just as she had his and time just went by, he could live in that moment forever.  


Since his sister was taken, he lived in the past and the present. His quest for truth replaced every man's quest for life of accompishment. He never thought about his career or family, he thought about his work. He had trouble letting go of the past, fearing that any thought of tomorrow might bring him dangerously close to questioning his own goals. He welcomed a case no one else wanted, a challenge that could not be programmed, categorised or easily referenced. They would always need someone like that, right?  


And then she was dying, and even though she didn't blame him, he felt as if he brought this upon her. In her blessed heart filled with compassion and responsibility she regreted having to leave him so early, and it almost broke him. He asked her to lie for him one last time, he died and came back to life only to see her on life support and realize how big a part of him belonged to her. That part that suddenly need life support as well. His selfish quest for truth was replaced in that moment by need to protect the one person that truly mattered. He was ready to sell his soul to the highest bidder and the devil made him choose. His past or his future, his quest or her life. He chose the truth and wept with a bloodied photograph of his past in his hand.  
From that day forward, he quietly worshiped the ground that she walked on. He was a man, and he abandoned his childish ways, his anal-probing, gyro-pyro levitating-ectoplasm alien anti-matter ways.  


The balance between them shifted, lost in the woods she sang him to sleep, in a crowded room she swayed smiling in his arms. She reached for him while drowning in memories of things he couldn't believe without proof anymore. In a controlled environment of a drawer in a trusted fertility clinic, he kept a secret from her, hoping one day her trusted science will find a way to turn the fate around. He held a gun to a man's face, and her child in his arms, and cursed the day man invented the word hybrid. He told her she's his one in five billion, he asked her to marry him, she didn't take him seriously. Next time he'll use less words. Three, to be exact. Or maybe no words at all.  


Over the years he lost his faith, lost himself, lost his family and his friends. He lost the X-Files got them back and lost them again. He lost Scully, and got her back, twice, he won't lose her again. They're on the verge, and together they will put an end to this madness. He owes her that much, he owes her everything really. They just need to hold on a little longer.

**Author's Note:**

> Part of Leiascully's October Fic Fest


End file.
